The last 24hrs

Tuesday, January 11, 2011by Melissa | 3 comments | Labels: , , , , , , ,

In the last 24hrs I have been on an emotional roller coaster. Not only struggling with the normal ups and downs of life but so much more. I am sad, confused, numb, hurt, happy, and satisfied all at the same time. Is this even possible? I am going to try to sum it up for you but bare with me if I start to babel a little.

Yesterday my morning started out pretty awful. It started with an awful fight with my mother which has still not been resolved. This is going to sound terrible but I am having some difficulty accepting her behavior. She just is being very selfish, irresponsible and lazy. Her priorities are not where they should be. All I did was make an doctors appointment for my niece. The poor thing has bad acne on her face and my mom (her care giver) was too lazy to make the appointment. She has time to go out with her boyfriend and play online but its too much to make an appointment for a child who cant make it herself. When I called to let her know I made the appointment she freaked, told me to cancel it. She said that she would do for her and to stop stepping on her toes. The funny part about this is, she is the one who gave me the insurance cards because she depends on me to make the appointments and take them usually. In my opinion I was doing what was best for my niece. How am I stepping on her toes if she doesn't even put her feet on the ground. She does nothing but sit on her ass all day or screw around with her new boyfriend. In the past few years I have watched her change for the worst. I have fought to keep my mouth shut for fear I would hurt her feelings. Why should I worry about hurting hers when she if hurting my niece and nephew. She has my 13yr old niece and 14yr old nephew doing things the mother should be doing. Tell me something If you stayed home all day and did nothing would you expect your children to cooking her own meals, find their own rides to and from her cheer practices, bring their own laundry to the laundry mat as well as go to school, homework, and clean? (there is so much more) She wants good grades but when do they have the time. I think all kids need to learn responsibilities but she takes it to another level. It just isn't realistic in my eyes to put so much on a child. Right now they should be being kids and concentrating on school.Well enough about that, I have to move on because I'm getting chest pains.

Although I had a rough day my evening ended in smiles. My son had been running around the house in just his diaper. I just hadn't got him in his PJ's yet due to my daughter needing help with homework. When I was finished helping Jazz I just couldn't bring myself to move, so I just sat with her for a while. Out of no where my son comes running into the room with his etch a sketch in hand demanding my attention. As he handed me the toy I realized his diaper was missing! What the hell, how did he manage that. I got a new one and put it on him not realizing that he had just made a huge accomplishment. After I had visited the bathroom and realized he had dumped apple juice all over his potty, or so I thought. After a minute I put it together, it wasn't apple juice. My son had used the potty all by himself. We haven't even started potty training yet. I guess this was his way of telling us he was ready. I'm not going to argue that, diapers aren't cheap!

Today, I finally heard from early intervention after weeks of waiting for an answer. I'm still trying to process the news. My son was not eligible for speech therapy. They said his scores were too low to receive any assistance. How do I respond to that? He is not speaking and I am concerned with that. On the other hand it was nice to hear that there is nothing wrong with my son. They feel he is well above average in everything but expression and speech. His primary care physician feels the same way but is still sending him to see a ENT specialist. Yet one more thing to reassure the crazy mom who wants her son to speak already!

So right now I'm still not sure whether to scream or laugh but the one thing I am sure of is I will get through this.


4timesblessed said...

You will get through this. Just wanted to comment on the crazy mom part who just wants her son to speak.... ummmm. you will be biting your tongue off when it happens cause then they don't shut up. LOL... I am kidding love you and you can get through this.

ProudUSARECWife said...

I am so sorry about the struggle you are having with your mom and over your niece and nephew. I feel bad for those two kids. Doesn't sound like they have time to be kids and they may grow up changed people, not in the good way, for it. I hope things can improve for all of you on that issue.

Way to go for the little man using the potty, all by himself too! That is such a huge accomplishment. Sounds like he is doing well and he may just be an observer and when he is ready and has something to say, he will probably spew out full length sentences.

Anonymous said...

She is who she is. It never really changed, it just laid dormant for a while.

It bothers me to hear about the kids though.

Glad the baby used the potty! Good news about the eval! Most kids develop on their own time, despite the neatly drawn up pediatrician reccomended developmental scale :0)

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